I spent my day at work thinking about my blog. I even wrote my thoughts down on the notepad in my iPhone. Really, who even uses that anymore? I tried my best to be honest with myself and wrote out the top 10 reasons why I blog. Here is what I came up with:
1. I appreciate people feeding my ego. If you're writing a personal, lifestyle, fashion or fitness blog, you have to have some narcissism in your reason to blog. If you don't, you're lying to not only yourself but to me as well. I don't like when people lie to me.
2. I want to show the world how much I love my family and how awesome they are. Because let's face it. I got a divorce. I decided to leave my ex. If anyone felt like a failure, it was myself. Who wants to look like a failure? Who wants to boast about how great their life is after they've made such a huge change, no matter how hard it is? I would. I do. Although, I'm one of the few that has bounced back on top with such a high success rate. I have a great man in my life. I might have a shitty job and the career part of my life sucks the biggest balls ever, but I'm happy and I'm in love. For some reason, I always thought I'd get divorced at least once. Probably because my parents divorced. Kind of makes me worried for my own child. The best example I can provide for him is to show him what it's really like to be in love and in a real relationship. Hopefully, he won't leap for marriage until he has that kind of love because he knows it takes a lot of hard work and isn't easy. I know how lucky I am. To have the little family I have & be as happy as I am. But I know, it took a lot to get to where I am, emotionally. It was a rough damn ride to be able to come terms that I was not a failure because I wasn't happy with my previous life. I'm not a failure anymore. I'm a success. I want to make sure the world knows that I didn't fit the mold & was much happier doing my own thing than following society's rules.
3. To be an honest voice. To have a place to write my honest thoughts. In a world wide web full of top knots, hipster glasses, link ups, etc, I felt like I needed to be that breath of fresh air for people who love blogging as much as I do.
4. I'd like to make money. Because I enjoy blogging and my job sucks. If it were possible to make money in the future, why the hell not. Unless, of course, I got a great job and didn't care about chump change income. I guess I'd just like to make money if it could help me pay my bills.
5. I take too many pictures and want a place to share them. This has been true my entire life. I hate taking great pictures or creating memories & having no one to show them too. I mean, I could show them on Facebook but what if it's something creative? Bloggers would appreciate a creative picture much more than a 40 year old relative who is just now learning how to use Facebook.
6. I have no real life friends. Many of my longest known friends have been through online. I have one real life close friend but that's it. Do you know some of the oldest friends I have, I met through the early days of Myspace? They are still my friends to this day. I'm a huge hermit but I also have a lack of friends because I move way too much. Hopefully, when we move to Seattle next year, I'll be able to make some real life friends that plan to stick around. Man, friendship takes a lot of work.
7. I want to be reassured that even though my life might be plain & boring right now, I'm just as cool as I think I am. Comments and responses reassure me that even though I'm getting older and time is gliding on by, I'm still awesome & young.
8. Blogging gives me a way to be around my family and friends all at the same time, every single day. Because really, sometimes, we just want to sit around the house all day, not saying a thing and just be in each others presence. What other way can I do that and have hundreds of friends surrounding me at the same time than being active on social networks?
9. Helps me meet people in my area, whether they want to get to know me or not, that like the same thing I do. Lets face it. I know of four bloggers in my town and we barely, if ever or never, speak to each other. I get excited to hang out with other bloggers & meet new people. I'm slightly offended that nobody wants to do the same but I have to remember that everyone has their own lives, their own friends & their own things going on.
10. I get to feel like I have my own thing. Something that is mine, that I own and is easily controllable. Easy to mold, easy to reflect who I really am. Something that I have absolute creative control over. I have the power to Good Luck Jenn and I decide its fate. I'm this blog's God. It's kind of neat to be the head honcho. The CEO.
Here are a few random thoughts I had with my struggles with blogging:
I am not a full time blogger. I should have no guilt. I should not feel overwhelmed. I should not feel obligated. I don't make money from this. This is not my job. I'm worried about my child's personal safety. Why do I feel like it's okay to expose my child to the public on such a broad scale. Or my family for that matter? For bragging rights? I'm not sure any reason is good enough.
Also, as much as I'd like to be, I'm just not a good commenter. I have so much stuff that I am doing right now, I simply don't have the time to comment every one. I try my best but I shouldn't feel guilty. I'm broke. I work early hours and I get tired very early. Whatever time I have left is mostly given to my family. Blogging has to come last. But I do read the blogs. So that new page view (that spent 2 minutes+ on your blog) is probably coming from me. I hope you can appreciate that more then a random "YOU LOOK GREAT!" comment that I jotted down because I only got a chance to look at your pictures & not read what you actually wrote. I say I HOPE but who am I kidding? Who doesn't love those damn comments?